From @/vero_muerte On Tiktok!!

Since the OP made their post unrebloggable (and blocked me. Both actions they are well in with their right to do)

I'm going to make my response it's own post because I think the point is important

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As someone who is autistic and has BPD and CPTSD and loads of trauma yes you sometimes need to change how you interact with others to keep people around

When I was 13 I hit the few friends I had when I was angry

I had to change that in order to keep those friendships

When I was in my early 20s if I was losing an disagreement with my husband I would threaten to kill myself. My husband told me it hurt him and was cruel and manipulative behaviour, because it was.

So I worked hard to change that to keep my relationship

It's easy to say "I shouldn't have to change for others" and that's true to an extent. You shouldn't change your interests or passions or dim your light. And you should have space to be imperfect and flawed and not have to pretend your ugly bits aren't real. But if something you are doing it causing other people harm you kinda need to change that.

That's called "living in a society"

People adapt to each other and make space for each other in their lives. You adapt to them and they adapt to you

You start being more diligent about throwing away the empty toilet roll because it really bothers them. They start warning you before they run the blender because you hate loud noises

I stopped threatening to kill myself because I was mad I was losing an argument and my husband stopped being so vocally judgemental amount media he personally dislikes

There is a certain type of person who heard the phrase "your emotions are valid" and took that to mean "my emotional reactions and my behaviour are always objectively correct because my emotions are valid and if you have an emotional response or react to what I'm doing negatively then you are wrong and you can't be hurt because my emotions are valid"

And that's a recipe for disaster

Your emotions are valid to feel. They are how you feel and there are reasons you feel the way you do

However, your reactions and behaviour are something you can learn to control and can be irrational

We live in a society and we as people change each other as we interact and that isn't necessarily a bad thing

yoooo guys these wings my dad made look INSANE i can’t wait to try them tomorrow

I just watched Identiteaze on Nebula with my partner @zatartheperfect-blog and holy shit was it good. Big gender feels, I loved every minute of it. If you're trans, intersex, or plural and haven't seen it you absolutely should. Big feels yo. My one "Criticism" is that I want more time in this world, but with the stinger at the end I get the distinct impression that this is only the first part in a larger project.

Nonstick broom

Friendo, I've been there. Unfortunately now I'm 32 and terrified

I used to be 21 but now I'm 24. so you can understand why I'm so freaked out

The Onion pulling zero fucking punches.

It's my 1 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

Y'all, I'm now just a Tumblr baby instead of a Tumblr infant lol