Accept Yourself

Illuminated Ridges by Trevor Anderson

to be seen without performing. to be heard without screaming. to be missed without disappearing. to be enough without proving it. to be held without falling apart. to be understood without explaining. to be wanted without conditions. to be. to be.

A friend of mine who’s been married for 10 years and has 2 children confessed to me yesterday that she’s tired of being a wife and a mother.

This isn’t the first time someone has said this to me. It’s mostly from women who got married and had kids in their early 20’s before they got a chance to realize the woman they really are. And they grow to hate their life and resent their family. And it’s heartbreaking to see how heavy their guilt is.

Marriage and having children is not the ultimate goal for some women. Many do it because they feel it’s the natural order of things and those women usually realize one day that if they had the chance to do it all over again they wouldn’t.

If you have doubts about wanting kids, wait. Don’t pressure yourself to have children because you feel it’s what’s expected of you.

And don’t marry someone either because you feel you must by a certain age or if you feel obligated.

It’s OK if you don’t want to ever get married or have children. It’s OK if you don’t want to become someone’s wife or mother. You’re not less of a woman. Live your life for yourself.