I Want To Listen To Music But Whatever Song I Put I Dont Like And Nothing Suits My Mood But Idk Wat My

starry decorations

aesthetic for @mathemaphia

the glide of a fountain pen across paper

wanting to understand the world and your place in it

an organized desk, everything in its place

finding satisfaction in the precision of mathematics

a freshly steeped cup of tea with fragrant steam

your favorite tea mug set out on your desk

splotches of ink on your hands, worn like badges of honor

always hungry for knowledge, eager to know more about everything

books that make you contemplate your own existence

novels by kafka by your bed

using math as a lens through which to decipher the world and its rules

gazing out the window on long car rides

language textbooks - french, german, korean - stacked by your desk

finding order and patterns in the world 

a contemplative soul, mulling over big philosophical ideas

pages filled with long strings of calculations

muttering verb conjugations as you work on memorization

wanting everyone to see beauty in math the way you do, even though it’s considered a frightening subject

researching your favorite authors

studying language, shaping your mouth around unfamiliar words

Very honest photo dump about how the month is going (i need a miracle to get me through these exams)

I'm overcome with nostalgia for a life that may or may not have been a dream.

i feel like a person again. i feel real as i taste the salt on my skin after a run. i feel the bitter winter current seeping through my bones. i feel the soft kiss of my quilt at every point it touches on my body as it embraces me in the cold, i see the cranberry and amber hues of the sunrise every morning as i wake to chase the sun, and i smell the fragrant aroma of the garlic cloves as they sizzle in olive oil in my pan while i cook dinner for my family. winter i love you.

dawn : the first appearance of light in the sky before sunrise

~ being awake before everyone else

~ having the whole world just for yourself

~ soft rays of light filtering through the windows

~ hopeful, serene, content

~ alone, but not lonely

(my personal favorite <3)

Arabic dark academia

Having tea first thing in the morning, the afternoon, evening, night and whenever you have nothing to do and whenever you have everything to do

Practicing calligraphy, hoarding calligraphy pens and quills like a dragon hoards its jewels

Youre now a calligragon btw

Pretentious hand written letters

Fragments of poetry and prose on the wall

In Egypt you can buy a vintage gramophone (as far as I remember)

Wrinkling your nose at orientalists who have clearly never been anywhere near the culture they're trying to portray.

Appreciating the orientalists who have in fact been there and paint like it. (Sorry to disappoint but there were never sexy slave babes roaming the streets)

Mourning for the scholars of Al Andaluas and times when Arabic was the language of science

Arguing over e'arab (the value of a word with regard to others in the sentence) and balagha (it translates to "eloquence" but is more like a complex version of figures of speech) of words

Arabic being such a complex language you get carried away sometimes

Passing the allotted wordcount so you start going over your paper and compressing a whole sentence, consisting of a conjunction, a subject, a verb and two objects into a word in desperation

Words like فأسقيناكموه (faa'skainakumooh) meaning "and so we have let you drink it" being an example.

Tea over burning coal. Over logs (hatab) tea over bokhour/oud hits different and you know it.

Brewing coffee over low heat and humming to Layali Al Ouns

"No offense but I like real coffee" when someone mentions starbucks

Um Kulthoum and Asmahan are superior you cant change my mind.

NO I DID NOT FORGET ABDUL HALIM HAFEZ I WANTED HIM A BULLET OF HIS OWN.

Fareed al atrash concerts at 3 am.

Nothing you ever cook will be under seasoned.

Reciting poetry to yourself in the mirror

Big chunks of jewelry (usually gold) engraved or woven through with intricate patterns and swirls. Wearing four bracelets in one hand is absolutely fine and under dressing is a myth

Owning swords is not out of fashion (ancient arabs were well known for their swordsmanship) but using them is, unfortunately <3

Wondering how they won wars with these swords. I couldn't even lift it enough to stab myself if I wanted

Extra names. People called شهد honey (shahd), جمال beauty (jamal), زهرة flower (zahra), ليلى night (laila), سماء sky (samaa), مهند/سيف sword (mohanad/saif) and صفاء purity (safaa) like it's the most normal thing in the world (which it should be, along with names of ancient gods)

Poetry from the abbasid era describing palaces and fountains and music so eloquently your heart skips several beats and you wonder how it is still beating at all and if, after all, you have been born in the wrong era.

Classic poetry from the school of Apollo brimming with romance and yearning you have never seen matched.

Poems that tear at your heart and stitch it whole with every bayt (verse? The equivalent for it) and you keep coming back for more.

Stories so well told that you swear you can see the princes and charmers and musicians and dancers all flicker to life in the flames before you

Historical masjids and churches.

Going to the palaces and shrines and towers from the ancient days of yore

Not exclusively (as neither is anything on this list) arabic but BRAIDS and braid jewellery that clinks when you shake your head

The unwavering belief that poetry is meant to be sung.

Singing poetry because it is meant to be sung

Thick eyebrows

Lining already lash lined eyes with kohl.

Beautiful brown eyes. Honey eyes. Chocolate eyes. Freshly turned earth eyes. Eyes that hold all the ethereal beauty of the world.

Hair styled in dark, thick curls or braids

Savouring the way the words move around from your throat to your chest to the tip of your tongue, like liquid gold,

The sweet music from the strings of a qitharah (string instrument)

Scented candles are cute, but have you ever heard of oud (perfume infused wood)? Anyhow one of my Sudanese friends make it AND IT IS BEAUTIFUL.

Wanting to study with the scholars of baghdad and azhar so bad

Recognizing that for all your culture, some of it is inspired by others and that's okay.

Please add what you can to this list. It is far from complete.

i’m fasting for 15 hours

How long are you guys fasting for?

I’m interested in seeing who’s suffering (i.e., me) and who got it easy lol

Reblog with how long your fasts are

I’m fasting for 17 hours

i used to be such a skeptic whenever i came across any mental health advice asking you to “move your body” or “drink more water” or “eat nutritious food and get sunlight” because how can you narrow down my psyche to these physical constraints?

to me, these seemed like empty words ringing across a hallowed hall devoid of any warmth or feeling. only once i started implementing these have i realised what a power the state of your body and biological functions hold over you. i don’t feel that heavy burden of feelings dragging behind me like a phantom, choking me and consuming me and binding me in an inescapable vortex inside my head. physical liberation from that dictator of malaise and despondency has turned me into a changed woman.

i no longer recognise myself and i couldn’t be happier about it. i should learn to forgive those past versions of myself, i really know i should but perhaps i shall need more time. i don’t think it is in my nature to be forgiving yet. does god not require penance in order to unshackle you from the manacles of your sins? perhaps more atonement from my end is required to appease my grieved subconscious. or maybe im just meant to linger in the shades of what could’ve been. either way, i think im liking who im becoming.