04/13/2025

03/26/2025

A quick update before I crash... Had a long day of school and vented to my best friend for an hour before doing work at night. I guess you can say I had a productive day of procrastination.

Completed

✅ Classes

✅ Seeing client

✅ Part-time job

✅ Research meeting

✅ Grocery shopping

✅ Sushi night

✅ Online quiz

How I feel during the day:

I still haven't written anything new for my thesis this week, and the stress and pressure are slowly getting to me. But my friend is right: What needs to get done will get done eventually. So maybe I can let go and live a little, breathe some fresh air back into my lungs, and stop feeling like I have to do a million things in a day for the next 6 weeks.

04/15/2025

Today, I think I tapped into hyperfocus mode because (1) I only slept for 4 hours, and this is what happens sometimes when I'm sleep-deprived, and (2) my period just started, so I'm getting some energy back? I still need more evidence to support this claim haha.

I am very grateful today because even though my follow-up appointment with my doctor was basically unnecessary (I think she Googled my diagnosis and gave me recommendations from online...), I had an overall good day. I was on time for my 9am class (after a few weeks of being late). I attended all my classes. I got food for this week. I tried to get my oil changed, but the shop was busy, and somehow the staff miraculously offered to change my oil for free because they overestimated their workflow (thank you, Universe!!!). I ended up going to do my car inspection today, which worked out. And I was on the phone with my partner for a couple hours while he shopped, and somehow I felt included and valued. It feels good to be loved and supported by the people around me and the Universe 🩵

Completed

✅ School ✅ Doctor's appointment ✅ Part-time job (didn't do my full shift today so I'll have to work more hours tmr...) ✅ Car inspection ✅ Renew car registration ✅ Phone call with partner ✅ Case presentation - part 2 (1.5 hours) ✅ Walk my dog ✅ Dinner ✅ Watch Everyone Loves Me ✅ Case presentation - final (0.5 hours) ✅ Clinic report - result 3 (0.5 hours) ✅ Clinic report - result 4 (0.25 hours) ✅ Clinic report - result 5 (0.25 hours) ✅ Sleep by 12:30am?

To-Dos

I switched out a task and finished 2 small ones instead! 🎉

[End of study: 12:25am] So ready for bed 😴 Can't wait to get my beauty sleep tonight because I so so deserve it 🩵

Energy Periods

OK, I have to note this down because I just recognized an energy pattern that I have! What a win!

3-6pm: my peak productivity time

when it is easier for me to focus and concentrate

especially on days when I have not done anything at this point, I feel like doing something so the day doesn't slip away completely

helps when I have time to ease into a slow morning and make food for myself (and exercise on some days)

12-2pm: potential medium to medium-high energy

I know that it is possible for me to start doing tasks at 12pm, so this might be a period where I can start with easier tasks and feel good about some small wins

I think this will be a good time where I build up the momentum to do my higher tasks later in the day

9-11pm: medium energy

there have been days when I can still complete school tasks or even write parts of my thesis during this period (tbh I can push until 12am but I really need to get some sleep before a full day of classes)

hopefully this will be a period where if I have not been able to get to my thesis tasks during the week, I can save 2 hours just working on it before I go to bed

I usually sleep better the next day if I do work on my thesis task the day before

My schedule doesn't always allow a ful-day of research/thesis work, so hopefully this will help me organize my time based on my energy instead of what I feel like people keep telling me to do. I'm definitely not an early bird, and I think it makes sense to follow my own energy/rhythm at this point so I can actually reach my goal of proposing my thesis by the end of April.

Another day, another progress post 🩵

04/05/2025

I just want a freaking free day!!! 😤 Do you ever get so tired of studying and school that you don't know how you're going to last another 30 days?? That's why I am right now. I can't. I just can't right now.

I so want to just say f it and go take a break for a day, but I also feel like I can't. I also don't work like most people, and nighttime is my friend. But then, I can't even enjoy a relaxing night because I need to do work... Make it make sense. Why do I feel punished in society simply by being a night owl? That's not fair.

Grievances aside, only 1 more day of this workshop, and I seriously still don't know how much I'm learning. I'm not sure if this will feel worth it in the end. Maybe I need to reevaluate tomorrow morning before I decide to go.

Me feeling angry (also exhausted and frustrated) at the whole world rn:

Completed

✅ Full-day workshop ✅ Check and respond to emails ✅ Clinic note revision ✅ Grocery shopping ✅ Phone call with partner ✅ Dinner and snacks ✅ Watch Me Before You (I cried my eyes out for this 😭) ✅ Phone call with parents ✅ Clinic notes x4 ✅ Add article summaries to class notes ✅ Read research articles for thesis (30 minutes - that's all the energy I have for today) ✅ Shower (finally!!!)

To-Dos

I cut out some original plans cause I overestimated how much energy I had lol. Full-day workshop is a energy-drainer... Time for bed 😴

04/01/2025

Today, I witnessed my growth. The same things no longer trigger the same reaction as I have learned to take a deep breath and trust in the process. I feel more in tune with myself, even though I did not get enough sleep the night before and the school day was long. Today feels like something finally shifted to the right direction, and I can hear my inner guidance clearly again. Today has been great so far =)

I think this is mostly thanks to my oracle card telling me to take "a day of silence." I haven't been alone with myself without music for a long time. I used to have evenings after work when I would unwind with chores and give myself time to process and express my inner thoughts. But grad school and living situations made it difficult. I didn't know how out of tune I have been with myself until I finally turned my thoughts and attention inwards today. It has been a wonderful experience so far. Awkward but meaningful.

Completed

✅ Group project 1 presentation 🎉

✅ School

✅ Part-time job

✅ Watch Kaichou wa Maid-Sama!

✅ Break time + nap

✅ Call my parents

✅ Dinner

✅ Watch Earl and Fairy

✅ Read and reply to school emails

✅ Group project 2 paper (1.5 hours)

To-Dos

Finished but I'm not too satisfied because I didn't get to finish more of the project paper than I had wanted. Guess it'll just need to happen tomorrow.

Trying to take it easy and not be so hard on myself today 🩵

~**~ Pinterest Inspirations ~**~

I don't know what it is. But I'm getting sick and tired of complaining. If you do that, that's fine; just don't tell me unless I am mentally relaxed or I ask you how you're doing. No offense to people who use venting to express their emotions in a healthy and productive way (I mean, I do that occasionally too). I just can't take it when I'm also getting stressed out and overwhelmed. It's more from childhood socialization so I am actively keeping myself in check for not judging over talking down on people who do that.

I think these two quotes just summarize why I need my peace. I find myself more tolerable to stress and the load of work I need to do in my life when I acknowledge that it sucks and move on. It is what it is!! And all I can do is do my part, try my best, and live another day 🩵

~**~ Pinterest Inspirations ~**~

I've been keeping this in my inventory for a while, but today felt like the right time to add this to my collection 🩵 I feel like I learned it when I saw this 2 weeks ago, but today I understood it. I have been hustling and bustling all my life, and I don't always take the time to care for myself and slow down. Today, I did. It felt so nice being able to walk home before the sun set, to play a quick game online before easing into a delicious nap on the couch with my dog.

It is so nice to be able to breathe again. To feel whole, to feel loved, to feel held.

03/28/2025

Started the day slow because I need it 😤

Music 🎧: Pop, Rock, Selena Gomez

Completed

✅ Shower

✅ Breakfast

✅ Part-time job

✅ Advocacy meeting

✅ Read and reply to school emails

✅ Write clinic notes

✅ Send clinic emails

✅ Finished A Sign of Affection anime 😭

✅ Review and write group project paper 1

To-Dos

⏹️ Pay bills

⏹️ Review and write group project paper 2

⏹️ Working on thesis (2 hours - it'll go by fast so I can do this!!)

If your semester is ending soon and it is exam season, I wish you all the best! Sending good vibes 🩵

End of day reflection (1:11am): I didn't have time to finish everything, but I am proud of myself for not running away from writing my group project papers. This is my first time doing a group project that involves writing a paper together. It is harder than I had expected, and I'm not a fan of not knowing how the paper will flow until the very end. Anyways, it was a good day today. Looking forward to writing more tomorrow =)

~**~ Pinterest Inspirations ~**~

Found this on Pinterest to remind me that:

Consistency > Overthinking

Even if I am writing my papers 1 hour a day, I am going to get them done instead of continuously overthinking and avoiding my work, which produces zero results. Not that I have to work without breaks and rest. I just need to start somewhere, anywhere.

Everything will work out eventually 🩵

03/27/2025

22:22 It's time to start! Have to keep reminding myself that it is never too late to start studying and writing my papers. Everything will work out, and it is going to be OK. I just need to believe in the Universe. Surrender the control I feel like I need to assert in my life right now and do what I can, one day at a time.

What I look forward to for my birthday 😮‍💨:

Completed

✅ See clients

✅ Classes

✅ Part-time job

✅ Meeting with advisor

✅ Revise my thesis timeline with my friend's help

✅ Watch 1 anime episode (current: A Sign of Affection)

✅ Dinner

✅ Sleep by 1am

To-Dos

⏹️ Group project paper

⏹️ Skim project book chapter

⏹️ Skim project articles

⏹️ Shower