Ron: Listen Mate I Don’t Think You Understand, But This Blonde Bloke Has Daddy Issue-

Pls

It's April 1st y'all

The best day to talk to your crush tbh

Shoot your shot!!

You get a positive answer: congratulations, I'm happy for you :)

You get a negative answer: pretend it was a joke and it's all good, I'm sorry for you but no worries you'll be fine

i feel so ashamed, making a big deal out of it...

i just.. i don’t know, i just realized i was lying to myself, and now that the reality hit me in the face, i gotta accept it.

something’s making me very sad about my crush

he’s very popular and handsome, so most people know him and most of his friends are also popular and all so you either like them or you’re a nerd (you see what i mean)

so every time i hear compliments about him, it’s like ‘you’re so handsome’, ‘you dress so well’, ‘you look so cool’, ‘your clothes look great’ and all

but as soon as you start talking about his personality, all you’ll hear is ‘he’s shallow’, ‘he doesn’t even have a personality’, ‘he only has looks’, or even ‘he’s dumb’

i don’t think i ever heard anyone making a compliment about his personality or his interests, not even his friends

whenever he makes a post on instagram, he easily gets hundreds of likes and about 100 comments in no time, everyone telling him he looks fine and he’s handsome, girls asking him to marry them, this kind of stuff

if he asks people to tell him something random in his story, everyone will tell him he looks good and he dresses well

and imma be honest, it’s true, he does look good, he’s very handsome and he dresses well; but he’s not shallow, he’s not here to just look good and shut up, he’s not superficial

the first time i heard about him was when he randomly texted me for the first time and we started talking; we had a lot of long and interesting conversations about so many things... beyond his looks you’ll find his interests if you just try to care about it.

he’s very cultured because he believes it’s important, he listens to pretty much everything, even traditional music from countries you forgot about, he enjoys learning new things, especially about our society and the way it works (here and in countries no one ever talks about), he loves music, plays guitar, he’s very funny and open-minded, he wouldn’t disrespect you, he’s very fun to be around, he likes to hang out and talk about literally anything, he’s the opposite of a fake, he’s real and you won’t feel embarrassed or out of place if you ever get to talk to him; if he knows what you’re talking about, he’ll give you his opinion and if he doesn’t, he’ll be interested and he’ll ask you about it, he definitely isn’t dumb, he’s also very talented especially when it comes to music

i wish people would just try to understand him like he’s always trying to understand how the world works; everyone loves him for his looks but no one cares about his interests, this is so unfair..

i’ve been talking to him for months and he always respected me, showed interest, helped me and supported me; he showed me kindness and a beautiful smile even after i said the most embarrassing things to him

i just hope he’s doing ok, i don’t want this to make him feel bad but he does know about people calling him shallow and superficial; i think he told me it was making him feel kinda sad because it’s not true

he deserves the world, not a bunch of fake people

i just thought i’d write about it because i noticed it quite a long time ago and i find it very unfair 

showed up in class with fresh cuts on my throat from the mental breakdown i had yesterday when i skipped class and one of my classmates laughed and said 'lmao did a cat do this?' but like really first degree and i remained silent and she was like 'ok..' and we've been sitting here awkwardly for 15min now

Me: this is great!!! I finally have time to write! I can make some progress!

Me:

me, drunk, coming home in the middle of the night, feeling the sudden need to cry because of this dumb sentimental delusion

just lent money to a guy i didn't know and he said he'd get me a drink someday and he'll pay me back :)

(no worries i don't know him but he's friends with my friends so it's safe and he's a good guy)

i told him i was logging off bc he was pissing me off and making it worse

and rn as i was crying i got a text from a friend i made literally three days ago and he said he was sorry for not doing the right thing at the right time and he hopes it's not making me feel too bad and he was feeling guilty about it and couldn't stop thinking about it so he decided to text me to check up on me and i started crying louder bc it's just so sweet of him, especially after what my other 'friend' did

texted a friend to tell him that 1. i was here if he ever needed anyone (bc he told me he had no one to talk to) and that 2. i've been treated unfairly and it's making me upset and his only answer was 'i need you to send me the thing i asked you for bc it's due tomorrow' and i can't believe i'm constantly trying my best for people that just couldn't care less

every time someone seems to kinda appreciate me i get my hopes up and i suddenly start getting my shit together like i text them first and dress well and i make sure i look ok and my behavior is ok and i try to be as kind as possible.. until i realize i'm too kind to them and way too uninteresting for them to like me even a slight bit and when it hits me i have this huge wave of hatred covering me and i want to destroy stuff and i start being distant because i feel betrayed and i start gradually hating them and every time i think about my very existence i just feel so pathetic and i hate myself even more and- anyway this is the story of how no one's ever been interested in