OMG. Somebody Start That RIGHT NOW.

Eliza: I am calm, I am relaxed, I am a happy tree.

The circle: *being the circle*

Eliza: YOU ARE MAKING IT VERY HARD! TO BE A HAPPY TREE!

————————————————

Stephen: Ok, I need you to swear-

Celine: Fuck.

Stephen: Swear as in promise.

————————————————

Michael, about Valentine: Have you ever looked at an authority figure in your life and thought, "Wow, I respect a well-grilled hot dog more than I respect you?" ———————————————— Lucian: Your friends are counting on you! Valentine: Well that's their falt. I've carefully cultivated a persona that screams, "You're on your own!" ————————————————

Robert: What the hell are you smiling for?

Valentine: Am I not allowed to be happy?

Amatis: Of course you are… it’s just that you being happy, usually means someone’s lost their life… or a limb.

————————————————

Celine, first joining: I know we technically have permission to do this, but this all feels highly illegal.

Stephen: That’s half the fun of it.

————————————————

Stephen: People say I have a unique way of lighting up a room.

Amatis: It’s called arson and those people are witnesses.

————————————————

Celine: Robert and I are getting closer. The other day he gave me half his sandwich.

Robert, whispering to Maryse: I mistook her for a garbage can

————————————————

Robert: I tried to write “I’m a functional adult” but my phone changed it to “fictional adult” and I feel that’s more accurate.

I'M WALKING WITH YOU.

Guys! Omg!! I found MY VIKTOR please WALK WITH ME WHEN I SAID

Matthew Daddario as Jayce

Lorenzo Zurzolo as Viktor

alec being teenage mom with two kids before ever having a ring on, izzy marrying indie boy band nerd, jace is jace, the lightwood siblings are the biggest proof why you shouldn't let your ex cultist coworker babysit your kids

shut the hell up this is one of the funniest things Magnus has ever said 😭

Growing up with really strict parents is crazy, man, because why do I have to teach all of my friends without strict parents how to lie and keep a secret? Like…girl. 🤨

They're going to find out if you keep acting as if people can't see you, talk, and end in their ears. Precaution. Ninja skills. Adapt to your surroundings.

When will I get a Xaden Riorson/Azriel Shadowsinger? — I ask uselessly to nobody as I get no answer from nobody because I'm an atheist and apparently that's an excuse for my unsocial and alone like the last Pringles ass to sin, according to my grandma.

Hunnybuns, cupcake, sugarpie, strudlemuffin.... STOP BEING PROUD OF YOUR IGNORANCE, YOU'RE EMBARASSING YOURSELF.

when you show up to the insane parabatai competition but will “jem is my great sin” herondale and jem “my will, my rebellion, mine forever” carstairs are already there

a writing competition i was going to participate in again this year has announced that they now allow AI generated content to be submitted

their reasoning being that "we couldn't ban it even if we wanted to, every writer already uses it anyway"

"Every writer"?

come on

HELLOOOOOO???? I leave ig for a day and this is what I miss 😭

Why's he so preeeeettyyyyyyyyyyy but also aging like the finest wineeee...

Like, sir? Is it you or is it Esther who I want to marry??

Matt posting again after a year 🥺

Me loves him so much