HAHAHA I NEEDED THIS

HAHAHA I NEEDED THIS

Hi! I've noticed a couple of times that you mention that you think Voldemort wants to emasculate Lucius and I wondered if you could explain why you think this?

because i've parsed the extremely subtle meaning behind him:

forcing lucius to hand over his phallus wand whipping out his own cock wand to measure it against lucius' appearing to find that his dick wand is longer, which he considers pleasing mocking lucius for losing the ability to sexually satisfy his wife assuming that he will receive voldemort's wand in return, when actually he is going to go wandless calling forth his enormous snake snake and stroking it while looking the wandless lucius directly in the eye telling lucius that he doesn't deserve a penis wand because he's so incompetent that all he's good for is being a eunuch staying in the house performing the domestic labour of looking after the dark lord's prisoners making clear to lucius [and the assembled group more widely] that he's fucked bellatrix and she loved it he's so important they worship him as a god while he treats their devotion with casual disdain informing lucius, his wife, and his sister-in-law that one of his wayward female relatives tonks has been banged by the enormous monster shaft of married a werewolf [which is also what happened when the sister of the woman he's failing to sexually satisfy andromeda was bouncing and moaning on it for married a mudblood] [which shows that the other two black sisters can't be satisfied by posh, pureblood men, proving that narcissa isn't satisfied by lucius either reflects badly on them] calling lucius' son and heir a homosexual babysitter and using lucius' dong wand to murder charity burbage, thus demonstrating his superior sexual prowess that he is so magnificent he can make any woman his whore produce powerful magic from any wand, while lucius can't

More Posts from Albondiguilla007 and Others

1 year ago

Amen

ron is a moral compass.

u cannot convince me that ron weasley isn’t a mother hen. because while hermione is a child prodigy, she’s breaking laws and committing war crimes half the time when it benefits her. and harry ‘i’m the Chosen One’ potter attracts danger like a flame would a moth.

so while they’re a duo of danger, there’s ron.

who grew up with siblings and spent a lot of his childhood making sure ginny didn’t get hurt playing in the mud.

who’s as nervous as Molly when Charlie works with the Dragons, and panics when Bill gets attacked by the werewolf.

who steals specific concoctions from the twins when they try to prank Percy because it could possibly harm him.

who wraps harry’s wounds when he gets hurt and is too tired to see madam pomphrey. who helps hermione understand why killing Rita in the jar wouldn’t help in the long run.

Ron Weasley, the worrier and moral compass of the Golden Trio. he doesn’t believe how many times he saved the wizardry world by simply being himself. and everyone at hogwarts but him can see it.


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3 months ago

My favorite Hogwarts Eighth Year Drarry fics

Part ll

✨ You cannot save people, you can only love them / 51k / Upon returning for Eighth Year, there are so many strange things going on with Malfoy, Harry doesn’t know where to start. He won’t talk to Harry, but he’s talking to ghosts. He won’t apologize for his past, but the Black Family tapestry has crossed him off its tree. And the worst of it all, he still has that infuriating, snotty mouth on him that gets Harry’s dick hard as a rock drives Harry insane.

✨ In Evidence of Magical Theory / 43k / When a hex meant for Draco accidentally catches Harry as well, they're forced to learn to understand each other in ways they previously might have thought impossible.

In which Harry and Draco can't fight, so they fall in love instead.

✨ You And Me / 27k / When Harry sits down with Malfoy, he's really only looking for a reprieve from the constant stares and whispers. (Mostly.) What he gets instead are a series of strange events that lead to a friendship that is something else, questions that nobody knows how to answer, and the realisation that the person that Harry doesn't know how to hate, anymore, seems to be the person who knows exactly what he needs.

A story in which everything is complicated. And yet, somehow, none of it is.

✨ You Look the Way I feel / 108k / Draco returns for his eighth year at Hogwarts in an attempt to salvage whatever he can of his future. His plan: sit as many N.E.W.T.s as possible, distance himself from the Malfoy name, and keep out of trouble. Of course, with his father on trial and at risk of unthinkable punishment, not to mention the anxiety-fueled "episodes" that have been plaguing him since summer, the school year doesn't go so smoothly. Especially when Harry Potter keeps seeking him out.

✨ Sex and the Art of Castle Maintenance / 14k / "Come on, boys," Zabini drawled. "You’re only delaying the inevitable."

Trouble always had a way of finding Harry, and eighth year was obviously going to be no exception.

✨ Hey, Potter / 16k / Harry returns to Hogwarts for his 8th year, determined not to let Malfoy get to him. But when the snarky teasing starts up again, Harry finds that returning the jibes with compliments has a far more interesting outcome.

✨ Mental / 186k / Harry has had quite enough of sharing his mind with someone else, thankyouverymuch. A miscast Legilimecy spell says otherwise.

✨ Nyctophilia / 107k / Everyone's back for 8th year, and Harry and his friends seem determined to spend their last year in school running around at night, hyped up on coffee and alcohol and Honeydukes candy, doing all the childish things they didn't have the chance to do before. Draco watches as he's always watched: from afar, quiet and bitter and hopelessly in love. That is, until Pansy decides she's had quite enough of it.

✨ Breathe Again / 64k / "It's a tough thing to admit, if only to himself, but sometimes Harry misses the old Malfoy, the one that used to taunt him at every turn."

After the war, a very different Draco returns to Hogwarts. Harry is determined to be his friend.

✨ Oxytocin / 179k / Draco Malfoy cannot sleep. If he keeps going like this, he will go mad, or die, or both.

For some reason, though, he can sleep whenever Harry Potter is with him. And Harry Potter is nothing if not a helper to those in need.


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10 months ago

Preach

It's interesting how it's more acceptable to be an "evil" character with redeeming qualities than a "good" character with flaws. Both are morally gray, so what's the difference? Aesthetic?

(Ex: Draco vs. Ron, Regulus vs. Snape, Narcissa vs. Molly)


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8 months ago
We Often See Slytherin Harry Being Friends With Draco. They Could Also Still Be Enemies, Draco Was Prince

We often see Slytherin Harry being friends with Draco. They could also still be enemies, Draco was prince of Slytherin, but Harry’s taking over his seat, he’s all polite n decent in front of everyone, bt when he caught Draco alone he whispered: “I’m taking over this house, and—


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9 months ago

a bloody psychopath & tom riddle

A Bloody Psychopath & Tom Riddle
A Bloody Psychopath & Tom Riddle
A Bloody Psychopath & Tom Riddle

save death eaters PLEASE

plumm_m


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4 months ago

Drarry fics that’ve made me giggle like crazy

✨ All Our Secrets Laid Bare / 149k / Over the six years Draco Malfoy has been an Auror, four of his partners have turned up dead. Harry Potter is assigned as his newest partner to investigate just what is going on.

✨ Mental / 186k / Harry has had quite enough of sharing his mind with someone else, thankyouverymuch. A miscast Legilimecy spell says otherwise.

✨ The Illusion that One Can Get Things Right / 119k / Blindsided by Ginny's sudden departure from his life, Harry struggles to care for his family—replete with a new baby. The situation plummets from disarray to pandemonium just as Draco Malfoy arrives to drop Scorpius off for a visit, because of course it does.

✨ Rookie Moves / 75k / Aurors Potter and Malfoy crack the case.

✨ Never Mind The Bollocks / 118k / If someone told Harry six months ago that by autumn he would be single, living on whisky and toast, and dancing the night away with Draco Malfoy, he would have told them to get their head checked.

And yet, here he was.

✨ The Lion’s Scales / 110k / When Harry Potter gets resorted into Slytherin in the middle of his fifth year, all doubts vanish: the Ministry is corrupt, and Voldemort is pulling the strings. Between unfriendly roommates, Umbridge's sadistic detentions and disturbing Occlumency lessons, Harry's life gradually becomes a nightmare in which loneliness seems to be his only companion.

Meanwhile, Draco unexpectedly finds himself caught up in a task he did not ask for, forcing him to face strenuous choices between love and hate—between life and death.

(non-con element only in one chapter, and not between Draco and Harry)

✨ Two to shore / 204k / Harry and Draco meet in Madam Malkin’s and instantly take a liking to each other.

Just kidding. They don’t, but Harry does get sorted into Slytherin, and they do become extremely good friends.


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6 months ago

Thank you for having me hehe

💚 Karma’s A Bitch By Albondiguilla

💚 Karma’s a bitch by albondiguilla

4,130 | Completed | E | Ship: Harry Potter/Tom Riddle

Tags/Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Alternate Universe - Muggle, Art Heists, Conman Tom Riddle, Rough Sex, Spit As Lube, Choking, Rape/Non-con Elements, Harry’s angry, He has a right to be alright?, Betrayal, Punching, Verbal Humiliation, Humiliation kink, Gratuitous Smut, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn, Explicit Sexual Content, Hung Harry Potter, Gratuitously Hot Harry Potter

Summary:

Tom betrays Harry. Harry’s not happy about it.


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11 months ago

PLEASE PLEASE YOU NEED TO READ THIS FIC.

I’m getting sucked back to the Drarry spiral omg.

I read this fic with the dumbest smile on my face for the entirety of it. It’s hilarious, it’s hot, they’re both dumb cops. Ughhh I love them. Both Draco and Harry are so sassy on this one, they banter so much they have the whole DMLE *exhausted*. Their boss is DONE. He wants to sack them but these two idiots just don’t care. They’re soooo horny for each other.

Also, those small moments of vulnerability and introspection Harry goes through are beautiful. They balance the fic so much. It’s a romantic comedy, but also an incredibly realistic portrayal of normal life…like? Aside from the fact that they live in the magical world of course. Harry’s pondering on the war, on his friends and on feeling lonely just made it a hundred times better.

Anyways, read it 😾

This One Scene Was So Iconic To Me And I Couldnt Get It Out Of My Head So I Drew It Quick In A Feral
This One Scene Was So Iconic To Me And I Couldnt Get It Out Of My Head So I Drew It Quick In A Feral
This One Scene Was So Iconic To Me And I Couldnt Get It Out Of My Head So I Drew It Quick In A Feral
This One Scene Was So Iconic To Me And I Couldnt Get It Out Of My Head So I Drew It Quick In A Feral
This One Scene Was So Iconic To Me And I Couldnt Get It Out Of My Head So I Drew It Quick In A Feral
This One Scene Was So Iconic To Me And I Couldnt Get It Out Of My Head So I Drew It Quick In A Feral
This One Scene Was So Iconic To Me And I Couldnt Get It Out Of My Head So I Drew It Quick In A Feral
This One Scene Was So Iconic To Me And I Couldnt Get It Out Of My Head So I Drew It Quick In A Feral

This one scene was so iconic to me and i couldnt get it out of my head so i drew it quick in a feral state.

(Rookie moves by peu a peu)


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8 months ago

😏 🤭 mmmm

James Potter The Man That You Are

james potter the man that you are


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9 months ago

SO TRUE

Been In Drarry Hell For 5 Months Now And I Still Get Whiplash From The Range

been in drarry hell for 5 months now and i still get whiplash from the range


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