Preoccupied By The Way Polyamory Is Treated With Hate. I've Gotten Hate For Even Approaching The Subject

Preoccupied by the way polyamory is treated with hate. I've gotten hate for even approaching the subject in the past. There's so much violent rhetoric and ideation surrounding it, so much genuine bigotry and prejudice towards people who practice it. But if you mention that, you get met with dismissal. It's not a big deal. You're taking it too seriously. Who gives a shit. Get over yourself. It is something that people respect so little that they refuse to even see it as a legitimate identity. Even left-wing progressive types will make jokes tantamount to thrashing blue-haired SJW snowflakes when it comes to polyamory. They're gross. They're weird. They're always cringe. It's never the people you want to be poly. I would rather kill myself. You'd think simply changing the structure of a relationship wouldn't be a problem, but even the most ardent defenders of equality can begin to say some pretty awful shit. Problem is, fundamentally, it is not seen as legitimate. It's not seen as deserving respect. There's all this handwringing about how these relationships are doomed to fail in order to justify this kind of thought and speech. It's bizarre to watch unfold. Frankly, it's the same sentiment and a lot of the same jokes as those cracked about nonbinary people. We're at a point where we've firmly accepted that everyone has a right to do what they want within the structure of social norms, you can take any side you want and do it with whoever you want. But as soon as you step outside of those norms, as soon as you go beyond the boundaries of social convention to find what suits you personally, everybody becomes a bitter reactionary.

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polyamory theory sexuality genderblogging hella real. people seem to really‚ really hate when it seems to them like other people are getting Greedy you're supposed to pick one thing and lose out on all the others‚ didn't you know? and there's a weird way in which it's like. seen as frivolous and immature to want more options like. you're supposed to Put Away Childish Things—like being dissatisfied with the box society has done its vicious best to shove you into— and Learn Your Place. and if you don't want to? we WILL be bringing our snidest most dismissive arsenal of insults to bear anyway i'm not saying anything groundbreaking here theorywise but. SUCH solidarity with all the other mistreated edge cases. (asexuals [and atheists!] come to mind also tbh. like. it's often ok to be these things privately—invisibly— but the second it's important to you and you want to speak up abt it? people WILL be sneering about how no one actually rejects you) (which. you would think the contradiction in the previous sentence would be apparent to people. but it never seems to be!) like i still don't feel like i've done enough poly to know if it's something i both can and want to do but frankly i feel exactly the same way abt mono relationships? but like. regardless of personal positionality i just feel so strongly like i‚ & really we all‚ benefit from the breathing room that's created when people push at these structures and broaden all of our horizons!! so like. in addition to it being. you know. shitty inexplicable bigotry that should be pushed back at regardless— no man is an island. etc.

More Posts from 7fff00 and Others

7fff00

2 months ago

Askos in the form of a zebu (type of cattle), Gilan Province, Iran, 1250-800 BC

from the Museum DKM

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art animal+ figurines more personal posts later when my Poster's Instinct returns from the wars but. for now pls join me in Experiencing this Creature. how aspirationally perfectly Itself it is. (selves — goes itself; myself it speaks and spells: &c) (what is a tagging system even. have some haphazard splotches of paint flung at the wall.)

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7fff00

3 weeks ago

i'm a big fan of the concept of using monogramming services for non-monogram purposes, as per the example (from alex mill) on the left:

Photo of a dopp kit painted with the letters BAG

Closeup of cream pinstriped pants embroidered with the letters IF

and in a similar vein, i recently saw the pair of pants on the right (from urban outfitters house brand iets frans), and thought immediately to myself, wow, i really hope the butt pocket says THEN…

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silliness obviously you're usually limited in your choice of letters but imagine like. a bag that says YES to the world. or NO! i had l.l. bean backpacks all through grade school and i'm envisioning one that just says NB non-binary? nota bene? so many beautifully ambiguous options… idk i just like the level of like. whimsy. messaging that nonetheless retains an element of mystery. etc choose your own short words!

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7fff00

2 months ago

what is your eye color. what is your favorite color. what is the color that appears most frequently in your wardrobe. what color is your favorite blanket. what color is your water bottle.

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1. bluegraygreenish? i went to squint at em in the mirror and there's a bit of a brownish/orangish ring around the center also sort of like. northern ocean tide pool eyes i guess. briny noncolor with seaweed in. 2. NEON like i don't so much have a Favorite Color as i have a Color Philosophy. namely 'oranges and greens and blues that are bright.' this transitions tidily into the next answer which is: 3. no idea! because my wardrobe is Very Full of Colors. marigold and ochre and highlighter green and neon yellow and ultramarine russet and maroon and vermilion and sage and pine and aqua and teal (there are also of course contrasting neutrals like faded navy and brown and grey and some black) but like. genuinely i'd have to go count garments to find out the numerical answer bc there's no single obvious outlier 4. do duvet covers count bc in that case mine is sort of a muted seafoam linen and i love it (though again like. really what i love is the color *combination* on my bed which is like. bluegreenochre) if duvet covers don't count then i guess we'll say my ~vintage~ moth-eaten wool blanket that's like. cream striped with honey and black (less visibly moth-eaten now bc i needle-felted over most of the worst bits!) 5. mango. it's cheerful and battered and perfect. anyway. any excuse 2 talk abt COLORS MY BELOVED. :) if you can't make your own serotonin sourcing it from the textiles around you is fine. etc etc

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7fff00

1 month ago

Photo of a pair of blue and gray striped socks with hand-mended heels, modeled by the blogger

baby's first attempt at mending sox any other way than by needle felting¹! as with all my very amateur attempts at mending we'll see how they hold up going forward,² but i had fun experimenting and so far they seem comfy?

⸻ ¹ an approach which ime works pretty okay on thick hiking sox, ftr, but which didn't seem likely to be well-suited to thinner ones like these :) ² i imagine that if i'd, say, used one long strand boustrophedon-style, that probably would have had a little more structural integrity than this more piecemeal approach. next time maybe!

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mending journaling i promise i will blog about some other things again someday but mending is just such a nice little sort of problem to address it's like. well these were threadbare and now they're comfy again. very obvious benefit. achievable in very bitesize time frame. etc

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7fff00

4 weeks ago

a simple brass signet ring with a tiny fire-breathing (cute) dragon engraved on it

the brass ring of unimaginable swag, 2025

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art dragons rings jewelry nodding love that this is cute as hell but also the way eg the wings are done gives it a sort of petroglyph quality so you end up with this vibe that's like. Small Enthusiastic Dog (Now Memorialized For Eternity) :D

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7fff00

1 week ago

made it to the transfer station before it closed (task i have been failing at for a week) AND nothing leaked in the car on the way over (despite decomposition of compostables very definitely having commenced) AND there was a hot butch there (presumably my reward from a sometimes-benevolent universe) 👍

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journaling mundanities domesticities

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7fff00

3 weeks ago

also. as long as i'm telling you guys silly little things. look at my absurd gluttonous beast who shoved her face into my tomato-y lunch leftovers and now has. well.

anime blush only orange.

Photo of white cat with a marigold stain on her cheek (remarkably well-coordinated with the tank top of the blogger sitting next to her)

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journaling domesticities ftr i HAVE tried to remove it but. multiple initial attempts were only partially successful will reassess tomorrow but in the meantime… we have this 😽 catblogging

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7fff00

2 weeks ago

[IDs: (1) Nine brands of butter substitute with increasingly desperate names:

is it butter?

isn't it butter

Could it be Butter?

I Think It Tastes Like Butter

You'd Think It's Butter!

What, not butter!

Unbelieveable… This is not butter

who needs butter!

Memories of Butter

and (2) a tag by Tumblr user @‍stripedtabbycat that reads:

#the emotional journey evoked by reading these in order is beautiful

/end IDs]

This is one of my favorites hand down

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laugh rule 'memories of butter' got me

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7fff00

3 weeks ago

[ID: Tweet by kelsey weekman @‍kelsaywhat that reads:

me when i fall short of a goal: agony me when I meet or exceed a goal: ok

/end ID]

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the thing is. this is extremely real and/but i do actually think you Gotta work on celebrating the small wins if it doesn't come naturally (it doesn't to me) like. not to bring a hideous sincerity to the 'chortling knowingly at self-deprecation' table. but.

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7fff00

3 weeks ago

ok i put on my dorky lil light-up vest & went for a long walk with my thermos of tea in the gloaming & saw the ocean (<3) & a bat (!) & sang deh placatevi con me & nur wer die sehnsucht kennt quietly to myself, & now i'm home again & nefret cat is lying in my lap like a warm heavy sandbag & purring—

in a bit i'll probably go get in the wet box & then reheat the last of the curry mee we made earlier in the week, & all manner of things shall probably in fact be well, actually!

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journaling mundanities lmao i will say. all these art songs sound SO morosely dramatic when you like. consider the actual text like for me it really is just nostalgically self-soothing Musical Content but then there you are in the glom of nit all 'es brennt mein Eingeweide…!' (speaking of which HOW is there no intestines emoji i ask you. when i'm head of unicode we will have the tiny knights and horseshoe crabs we deserve.) anyway. CRITICAL updates on my mood & doings obviously. :)

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